An Open Letter : First Time Mum

Dear Mama-to-be,

This is your first rodeo and congrats on that! Carrying a human in your abdomen for the better part of a year is no joke and getting it out of there isn't something to take lightly either. You're a rock star. You might not feel like it, but the fact that you have done the above alone would qualify you for the superhero wall of fame not to mention the fact that now, the hard part starts.

Now you get to raise that little monkey nugget.

Now that you're a mum, you'll be faced with a lot of unsolicited advice from everyone you've ever met. It will be annoying and probably make you feel inadequate. But here's some sage advice that will actually be useful. While I don't pretend to know about much of anything, but I've lived it, so that counts for something, right?

Put a hat on your baby in anything less than 65 degrees. This will ward off the lovely, opinionated grandmas who feel the need to comment on how you have failed to dress your child warm enough.

Sling that newborn to your body ASAP. Especially in public. It's awesomely cozy, your baby will love it and your back/arm/neck will thank you for putting down that car seat carrier. Plus, people tend to give your baby space when they're attached to you.

Be as minimalist as possible. Babies are tiny but they come with a ton of crap. Some of that crap is necessary but a lot of it is just clutter. Get the essentials and then learn what you/your baby need beyond that. I've had mum's that consider a Diaper Genie a "must have" but I find throwing those stinkers in the outside bin just as easy and a space saver.

Bottom line, take note of suggestions, but only get/keep what you actually use.

Accept hand-me-downs. Seriously, seek out a friend who buys cute clothes and has a similar style as you and get them to pass their kids' clothes on to you! Seriously, my kids are dressed 90% on other people's clothes and get compliments all the time for their "style". Plus, getting essentials at £0 frees up some extra spending money on special items you might otherwise not be able to splurge on.

Mostly, when you haven't showered in days, have food hardening on the dishes in your sink and have soaked every nursing top with your leaky breast milk, know a couple things:

1: You are not alone

2: You are amazing

Sincerely,

A mum whose been there

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© 2020 The Motherhood Group, Coordinators of Black Maternal Mental Health Week UK